"You're a Failure"

2600. Band 3. Not quite the end of the world, still enough to apply to some Russell group universities, albeit not the best ones. That was my thought process until 3 of my 4 Medicine options, including Birmingham, rejected me outright before the interview stage. And the interview from the remaining option? Its rejection felt like the final nail in the coffin. At this point, if anyone had asked me, I would’ve said that I was a failure. Except what I didn’t know was that The Best of Planners had laid out a path that was better than getting accepted after that interview. Had that happened, I wouldn’t be studying Medicine at UoB right now. 

I fell ill towards the end of Year 13. I couldn’t sit the exams that year. I instead sat them a year later. With that came a new round of applications and a 2nd chance at the UCAT. Remember how Birmingham had rejected me before the interview stage? This meant I could apply to them again, since most Med schools have a policy of denying students a 2nd application attempt if they have already been rejected after an interview. Just like that, something I had refused to see as a positive in my despair changed the trajectory of my whole university career.

In Islam, failure isn’t criticised, rather there’s a strong hadith reported by Abu Huraira that goes:

‘By the One in whose hand is my soul, if you did not sin, Allah would replace you with people who would sin, and they would seek forgiveness from Allah, and He would forgive them’ (Sahih Muslim 2749).

In other words, it would be against the very nature of humanity that Allah has created us with, if we were perfect beings who saw no failures. 

So what do failures mean? How do we know if it’s a form of Divine Punishment, or rather, Divine Wisdom (Qadr) leading to a better outcome beyond our understanding? The thought of being punished for wrongdoing can lead people into further hopelessness and negligence of worship, creating a cycle, which is why our mindset has to be the intervention; whether a failure is due to punishment or Qadar, our action point should still remain the same: tying our camel tighter, and strengthening our faith in Allah. In my case, this meant putting in the effort to revise for UCAT and my exams again, then making extra prayer or du’aa to ask Allah for the best outcome. We have to take the initiative to be resilient (embracing hope) and not despair (embracing hopelessness).

Am I telling you that after a failure, you need to take a giant first step in order to stay on the Sirat Al-Mustaqeem (the Straight Path)? What if I told you that the failure itself is actually the first step…

"فَإِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا (٥) إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًۭا(٦"

“So, surely with hardship comes ease. Surely with ˹that˺ hardship comes ˹more˺ ease.”

- Surah Ash-Sharh (94:5-6)

Our Holy Book is telling us that after any hardship (of which failures are), comes ease! And to really drill that in, it’s written twice. There’s a concept in Islamic theology that links to this called Istidraj, which refers to a gradual process where Allah grants worldly blessings to people who are disobedient and sinful, increasing their heedlessness and neglect of faith until they are suddenly seized by a devastating punishment. The failures and trials that we face become testament to us being free from Istidraj; we aren’t among those that Allah has willed for devastation. Rather, we are among those who can overcome our worldly failures and continue to strive along the Straight Path.

No one’s saying that embracing failures is easy, but it’s always possible, as the only failure we can’t recover from is that of the Hellfire. Allah is Al-Wakeel, The Disposer of Affairs. May Allah dispose of our affairs and guide us through our failures whilst keeping us on His Straight Path, ameen.

- Amarr Syed